Women's Health Products

Posts Tagged ‘abortion’

is abortion more beneficial or harmful? is it necessary and essentioal to a healthy and social life?
tryna finish an essay, and open opinions are welcome

Nearly 20 years ago as a college freshman I found myself with a fairly new boyfriend and an unexpected pregnancy. My plan was to place the baby and stay in school; I totally let the guy off the hook — we didn’t know each other well at all, and even though I liked him well enough… we just hadn’t been together that long and I didn’t want him involved.

My parents, though, begged me to keep the child. They said they couldn’t face the thought of of their grandchild "out there and unknown to them." More turmoil in an already tumultuous situation.

The guy stuck around. He actually turned out to be a fantastic support and amazing friend when I really needed one. The college I was attending was small/private/Christian & wanted me GONE. I agreed to keep my pregnancy a secret and leave after exams. Actually, I begged and they did the agreeing.

My good guy turned into Mr. Wonderful one day when he said: You know, we could just get married. We don’t know each other that well… but we get along great, and I think it’ll be okay. Let’s give it a try.
So we started planning a small wedding.

But, at my first ultrasound I was told I was fully a month LESS pregnant than I thought. I was shocked to realize that meant the baby wasn’t his, but a long-gone one night mistake with a group of friends out of town over the summer… one of those regrettable things.

I told him, and his response was: I very much want to marry you, but I cannot be a father to someone else’s child.

He asked me to have an abortion but continue with our plans to marry. I did. We did. We told everyone we lost it. He comforted me by saying not to worry, we’d "try again" soon, and not long after we got married we did have our first daughter. Now we have two girls (15 & 13). He is an amazing dad; he works hard and we have a great life.

Meanwhile I’ve been living all these years so incredibly sorry for what I did — giving up MY child just because he asked me to, and without very much thought. As our girls have grown I think about my first, wondering what he or she would have been like, everything at every stage. I can’t let it go, and as time passes I find myself angrier and angrier at my husband.

He is such a great dad to our kids, but he so quickly wanted to get rid of mine. No one had to know, and the baby was an innocent. I’m not discounting my part in any way — I beat myself up in more ways than I can count for what I so easily threw away.

I have been to a therapist who wanted me to see an intensive Grief/Loss person — the problem is this: If I go talk to someone like that I’m going to have to tell them how very angry & resentful I’ve become toward my husband. He doesn’t know. We don’t talk about it.

I just don’t know…

**Sorry this turned into a novel. Thanks if you took the time to read it.**

I want to hear answers from those that had at 14 weeks abortion and how they feel, do they regret just because of the stage, do they feel their bodies changed a bit? I’m curios because it is after the first trimester but not that late and I can’t find many stories online with this stage of abortion. Maybe there are really few and not so often who experience this term termination of pregnancy.

I’m 22 years old woman.
And it seems lately i’ve been feeling lonely at home.
When i’m out with my friends im outgoing, im talkative i love to joke and i’m not a quiet yet not a loud person, just normal.
I have a good amout of friends for my age. i have like 5 really close friends that i guess i could call my best friends.I live with my parents, but even we aren’t that close. But I just feel like almost everday i NEED to hang out with my friends. Like i need to be around my friends. I feel like when i’m home alone on a weekday which is NORMAL totally lonely. I think of my problems with guys or such. When i’m alone i even get an anxiety somewhat. Boredom. I dont know what is it. I don’t know if i’m depressed, if i’m bored, or whats wrong. I am going to school right now not working. I plan to take a break after this semester and work. Thats why i THINK it might be a boredom issue, but then I think its a lonely thing.
My ex roommate stood in town at my house for the weekend and i loved it. I loved having someone to come home and talk to, whether about problems or anything. I feel like i want to be in a relationship though. I’m not unattractive or anything but recently broke out of a relationship with a horrible guy who made me feel insecure about myself by putting me down and verbal abusing me. He even got a little physical toward the end when he pushed and practically hit me when he was drunk then spit on me another time. I got pregnant with him and he made me get an abortion (which considering who he was made me realize it was the best thing that could’ve happened). Its been 2 years since i’ve been in a relationship with a nice and caring guy, for the past 2 years its been either that ex or guys that just want to hook up and thats it. Which leaves me even more empty.
I also wonder if the pregnancy hormones could effect my personality now, because i feel like a more negative, down person than i used to be and i dont know if that could effect it.
I mean i’ve gone through these stages…off and on since high school. Maybe thats why i’ve been in relationships alot because i feel like i need someone around to just be around..if that makes sense.
But maybe this is normal?
If its not do i contact my regular doctor or do i need to find a psychiatrist?

I’m finally realizing i might need help thanks.

is it easier when you get an abortion during the very early stage of a pregnancy.
please don’t lecture me. I’m 26. ;-)
no I’m not pregnant either. I’m just wondering about it.
hpfreak…you didn’t sound preachy. Your answer was well written. ;-)

He said that if the woman dies during the abortion the guy can go to jail.Is this true.